Trying to be Wonder Woman....

I am very sorry that I have slacked off on posting since our little bundle has arrived, but we were having feeding issues one week and once we got those resolved, she got a viral infection and has been feeling under the weather, and when a newborn is feeling under the weather so is mommy.

I can't speak for all women at there, but I know one of my personal downfalls is that I try to do too much, and when I can't meet those unattainable goals, I come down pretty hard on myself. I remember when I was preggo with my 1st child, I was on strict hospital bed rest and gained close to 50 pounds, and being an ignorant 21 year old, I brought my standard pre pregnancy outfit to the hospital, size 6 GAP jeans and a small GAP t-shirt, because my way of thinking was once this baby came out I would magically shrink down to my old size, I guess I assumed that he would be a 60 pound baby. Well SHOCK AND SURPRISE!!!!, when he was born I had to send my husband out to find me something that would fit.

Well, my baby is now almost a month old and NOTHING has gone according to my LIST of wonderful summer stuff that we were all going to do since I was home and was getting to spend time with all my kids. There has been something going on every week to prevent any truly fun activities. My husband tries to remind me that it is still early on in the summer and we still have time, and that everything is fine.

Next frustration is since I have been home nothing is getting CHECKED OFF my TO DO LIST for the summer. NO top to bottom cleaning of the house. NO home cooked meals 7 days a week. NO putting on pants that have a zipper. I told myself that I would be out walking the neighborhood every morning to lose the pounds, nope none of this either. I have to keep reminding myself that I am never going to be like the women in the magazines, the ones who lose all their baby weight in one month and say it was just from breastfeeding. We are all beautiful and don't need to feel bad about ourselves for any reason.

I am praying everyday about not getting down on myself and to stop putting almost impossible ideals upon myself that I can't possibly manage to meet. I have had some pretty emotional days, with all the feeding issues and sickness, but I know that things will get better.

I have been very overwhelmed with taking care of 3 children, taking care of my house and trying to be a good wife and mother. I put all the pressure on myself to try to do it all, my husband gets frustrated at me because I try to do too much, and God love him he does more than his fair share of everything, I really have a great husband.

I know that this entry may sound whiny or may not make sense (sleep deprived), but I know that I am not the only mom out there to put all the pressure on ourselves, and I just wanted to put my insecurities about trying to do it all and falling short out there, because some days we just need to hear that we are not the only ones to feel like that. Just remember, that to who this represents, we are all good moms, wives, providers, housekeepers, psychologists, taxi drivers, cooks, and everything else us moms do on an everyday basis.

OK, I am done with my ranting and raving.

I hope that as soon as Baby O starts feeling better I can get back to some of my W.I.P's (Work In Progress) , and get some posted, so thanks for anyone out there that has continued to look at my blog. Thanks...